The Bacon, delivering the real news

Lourdes Ginart/Staff Writer

What do headlines like “Artwork on MMC Campus to be Censored,” “CIO Uses Tech Fee Money To Build Office Out Of iPads,” and “Quiet Asian Student Still Waiting for Professor To Show Up” have in common?

They are the hard-hitting investigative articles of FIU’s prestigious newspaper. The Bacon.

Aside from The Beacon, a mere shadow for a newspaper compared to FIU’s other student media, there lies a newspaper one of a kind.

The Bacon covers the scandalous, political, and day-to-day stories of the University–or used to, keep reading for more deets.

The Bacon has reported news far more in-depth than The Beacon–articles like the potential for zebra and leopard to be FIU’s new school colors, and the school’s new parking violation policy: vandalism.

The Bacon even surfaced information that The Beacon printed false and made-up information; found in an interview they had with the paper’s editor-in-chief, Lazaro Mercadante.

Funny, I’m a staff writer and never met the guy.

In its superiority, The Bacon has even found the funds to publish studies!

The latest study, “Most MDC Transfer Students Can Neither Read Nor Write,” showed the lack of education Miami Dade College students receive versus FIU students. Not only did this study find MDC students obtain an extremely poor education, it also showed that MDC has resorted to hiring animals as teachers, like Assistant Professor Barky Henderson, a golden retriever who teaches algebra at MDC.

Above from conducting studies, The Bacon also seems to have the upper hand on reporting stories; their writers have the luck to be in the right place at the right time.

Last year, one of The Bacon’s writers witnessed former football coach Mario Cristobal win a bar fight against three men.

You couldn’t pay for that type of coverage!

The Bacon, delivering “FIU News So Hot, It’s Sizzling,” was founded in 2011 by the same students who conduct the FIU Memes Generators, or better known as “those guys in morphsuits and Guy Fawkes masks.”

But tragedy struck when The Bacon staff mysteriously disappeared after Spring 2012.

The Bacon’s website remains running not only to keep alive the memories of the missing writers, but to remind students that there was once a true newspaper on campus. The type of newspaper students could depend on for the latest news, outbreaks, or student life. Whether it be the measures students are taking to avoid old friends or the newest addition to FIU’s athletics departments, NFL star Brett Favre.

But seriously, The Bacon is a satirical newspaper that began last year by “those guys in morphsuits and Guy Fawkes mask.”