Darius Dupins/Staff writer
I tried to come up with reasons as to why it’s not so bad to be single on Valentine’s Day. On a day where singles are constantly reminded of how sad we should be, it can be a day of self appreciation or you can just go do whatever you want. Then again, Valentine’s Day is overrated anyway! Why do people hype themselves up for such a pointless occasion? There are more important occurrences happening in the month of February, like remembering those who fought for the black cause and recognizing our triumphs and what we’ve contributed to society as culture. Okay, sure, you can argue that I’m bitter because I’m single but that’s not the case.
I am not lonely. I have me and I can spend Valentine’s Day however I want. Of course, it would be a slight comfort to have a date or at least someone who had an ounce of a crush on me during Valentine’s Day; but then I realized how much I can do for myself. Valentine’s Day customs have become more of a marketing effort that it is starting to become a knee jerk reaction. Why are girlfriends and boyfriends made to feel obligated to buy each other corny cards and disgusting, chalky heart-shaped candies?
I fantasize about being in love and I also think about what expectations come with that. I don’t want a bouquet of flowers or the hollow box of chocolates. I refuse to feel obligated to spend money on items that are common amongst Valentine’s Day lovers. Not only do the basic customs of Valentine’s Day cause a disturbance in me; but weddings are the absolute worst, as well. Let’s just have a private ceremony and not tell anyone until a year later.
I’m huge on privacy, which is another reason why Valentine’s Day is obnoxious. Why do we feel the need to showcase our love in such grand gestures only on Valentine’s Day? Those couples who do this daily can kick rocks, by the way. From the random quartet breaking out in harmonies in the middle of the library to public marriage proposals, expressing your love to someone should be special and should also happen everyday. These gestures of appreciation and love don’t need to be grand but should at least be tailored to your lover. That is what should make the gesture special and unforgettable.
At this point, being single before Valentine’s Day is stress free: no expectations of a gift or setting yourself up of what’s to be expected period.
I’m without a boyfriend by choice. A seemingly weak excuse coming from a single millennial, but this isn’t my first time at the singleton rodeo nor is it my first time being single on Valentine’s Day.
As Valentine’s Day rears its crimson, heart-shaped head around the corner, singles are reminded that they are, in fact, single. The constant dings and buzzes are WhatsApp messages from classmates and deadline reminders; I wish they were potential husbands at times, but being single at anytime isn’t as bad as it thought to be.
“I’m an only child. I’m used to being by myself,” I respond to friends when asked if I’d be okay being by myself on Valentine’s Day. I then proceed to explain to them that I am comfortable being alone because I understand how that may sound: Sad.
Being single can be a fascinating time that provokes thoughts of self-worth and moments of personal growth. You can also celebrate Valentine’s Day your way and not feel obligated to order a $100 bouquet of flowers for the individual who you might not even be dating in the next year.
Being a member of singleton also allows you to be selfish. Taking care of yourself is one of the most important things we forget to do when romantic relationships take precedence. Being single is a time to bask and relish in the time you have with yourself. Not only are you able to eat the extra large pizza by yourself but you also have time to reevaluate how you approach relationships and what you’re willing to put yourself through in your next partnership.
Each time I’ve had a break up, I allow for the necessary time to be upset, listen to Adele’s “21” on a loop for about a week and then I’m over it.
I never had what is believed to be a real Valentine’s until two years ago. His name, Rene. Tall, sturdy, slight belly and hairy. Before Rene, Valentine’s Day was an evening of my favorite cult-classics: “Clueless,” “The Sweetest Thing,” “Friday” and “The Shining” and no doubt I’ve already eaten three Tombstone pizzas, because why not? A bottle of Malbec and a bowl of cheap, assorted chocolates are in arms reach, too. Not only am I watching “Friday,” I’m also feasting on the best of the worst frozen pizzas and while watching 90s Paul Rudd and a young, bubbly Cameron Diaz.
If you’re single on Sunday, don’t fret, there are others like us! Not comfortable being alone? Surround yourself with a group of friends and show them how much you appreciate them. If that’s not your style, then join me in buying a bottle of wine, frozen pizzas and settle in for a night of nostalgia and romantic comedies.
Disclaimer:
The opinions presented within this page do not represent the views of FIU Student Media Editorial Board. These views are separate from editorials and reflect individual perspectives of contributing writers and/or members of the University community.
Image from Flickr: https://www.flickr.com/photos/sis/98174687/sizes/l
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