Younger Generations Play The Field Before Settling For Love

Viharachard Dorval/Staff Writer

The Graham Center: a place where most students on our campus congregate in search of food, social exchanges and apparently love — but without the commitment.

For the past couple weeks, I’ve noticed a pattern forming: students approaching each other, having lunch, disappearing together and ignoring each other the following week. Unfortunately, the inevitable “ghosting” aspect after most of these situations isn’t at all surprising. Hookup culture is definitely not a new concept, but the hesitation of entering into long-term committed relationships definitely is. 

Unlike many of our parents who probably met in college and fell in love, many of our interactions with potential love interest have been abrupt or very casual. This could very well be due to the large amount of options we have compared to the generations before us.

When my mother first arrived to this country back in 1985, it was made clear by her family that she immediately find a partner to begin a life with. With the fear of potentially losing her citizenship or being taken advantage of, she took a chance on my father. Although they had only dated for a couple of months, they quickly got married and started a family.

As much as I admire the 30-year marriage between my parents and the commitment they made to one another, I often wonder, had they both had the time and opportunity to seek themselves out as well as others, how far they both could have gotten in life. 

Undoubtedly, the endless variety of potential partners to conquest curves our ability to settle down with one person. And what’s the rush? Millennials and Gen Zers still have worlds ahead of us in terms of career, life experiences and more.

Additionally, the #relationshipgoals have slowly but surely been exposed as just that, a hashtag. Whether it was witnessing your parents’ divorce or seeing the demise of your favorite Instagram couple’s relationship, the bitter reality of seemingly happy relationships separating is a bitter pill to swallow. It has caused many millennials and Gen Zers to pause when it comes to entering into long-term relationships.

A casual hookup, however, is easier in most cases. It’s a lot more transactional and if both consenting adults are on the same page, it won’t result in broken hearts, hurt feelings and wasted time.

The concept of finding “forever” at this point in our lives just seems unrealistic. The boomers have somewhat given us a glimpse at what our futures, in terms of romantic relationships, could be and we have politely declined. It seems we have chosen to explore all that life has to offer before we completely take ourselves off the market.

Instead of feeling the urgency to find “the one,” we instead feel the need to find ourselves first.

Featured photo from FIU Flickr.

 

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